New York, NY – Even as I type this I am aware that I am run the risk of dating myself but hey here goes nothing. When I was in those formative pre-teen/teen years we had a special term if you were interested in or dating someone. You didn’t say the person was your boyfriend or girlfriend you merely said “you were talking to them”. It was vague but not intentionally so. I am not sure how or why that became the turn of phrase but I remember it clearly. “Hey man what’s up with you and Jane? Are you talking?” You in turn would nod; grinning “Yeah man I’m talking to her”. That was it. That simple exchange told you everything you needed to know. We were younger then. Everything was simple. When you broke up the reverse was true. You just weren’t “talking” anymore. Now I am older. Everything is less simple. Now we’re not “talking to” one another anymore. We’ve replaced it with “talking at” one another. We say more. The words come faster, harder now. Supposedly filled with more meaning but I wonder about that. I think we just talk at each other more because it’s easier. We drive each other to distraction with words. Easier isn’t the same as simpler. Simple implies I am getting to the base of something. Breaking it down to it’s base elements. Easy? Well easy sounds lazy to me. I think we should all try to be a little less easy. Let’s strive to be simple. Let’s “talk to” each other again. Sade has a new song “Soldier of Love”. I like that song. It’s Sade after all…what’s not to like?  Her voice and music blend perfectly to conjure images of deep longing and affection. You see yourself going off to battle in the name of love. That image is powerful and romantic and has its appeal but on the other hand I can see the one sidedness of it. Soldiers by definition are marching into battle to enforce a particular way of thinking. Soldiers don’t negotiate. I think I would rather be a missionary of love. Missionaries have a point of view and a belief system but they lead with talking. Missionaries extend a hand and they open to you. It comes from the deep rooted simple belief that they have something to share with you. Something that is important and sacred. So it’s Valentines Day…now all we need are the missionaries.

The FREE Man